Two little monkey's jumping on the bed...

...One fell off and broke his arm. Friday night at 7:30pm getting ready for bed, the boys starting jumping on our bed. As I was telling them to stop and it was time to get on jammies, off comes Bryce. (I was in the other room at that moment getting Bryce's pajamas for him). I hear a cry/scream that I had never heard before. I ran in seeing Bryce roll from his left side to a sitting position. I quickly pick him up from under the arm pits to comfort him noting that as I did so one shoulder felt funny and out of socket. While holding him, trying to comfort him I called Brady who was helping someone move and told him to come home b/c Bryce broke his arm. I then called my mom who also came right over. I looked more closely at Bryce who was just whimpering at this point and noticed a bulge from his left elbow. I continued to try to comfort both Bryce who has his head on my chest and Carter who is near tears because he feels bad about what happened. I hug and kiss Carter telling him how much I love him and it was an accident but we need to go see a doctor to help Bryce feel better. Brady and my mom flew in about the same time, I wrapped a coat around Bryce, kissed and hugged Carter once more and had Brady drive us to the hospital and my mom stayed with Carter.

Once at the hospital, they x-rayed his left arm, which as you can imagine was a painful experience. As Bryce was crying, I let my silent tears fall on the top of his blonde head, which was now damp with sweat in addition to my tears. How I wished I could have taken away his pain. If only it were me instead. I would do anything for my children, and I felt so helpless. All I could do was continue to sing to him and whisper calming words of encouragement. Brady of course was amazing. He was able to focus on Bryce but also on my needs/feelings at the same time. I was able to hold and comfort Bryce while he held and comforted me. Moving Bryce's arm in different positions to get different angles, listening to him cry, kissing away the tears, I couldn't help but think of Heavenly Fathers immense love for us all. To watch your son be in such pain and to allow it to happen... it baffles me as a mother. I don't know if I could ever watch a child in pain, knowing I could stop it at any time and not. The spirit testified to me how much the Lord loves each of us and how much Jesus loves us as well to have suffered that way for us so willingly and lovingly. I still have much to learn.
After x-rays, we were wheeled back on our stretcher to the pediatric ER. The doctor came in and told us it was definitely broken at the bottom of the humorous at the elbow joint. A portion of the bone had completely detached and was broken off. The brake was over 5mm detached from the bone, and typical brakes are between 1-2mm. She said they were not comfortable dealing with such a severe brake especially in a child so would transport us to Children’s Hospital in DC. She informed us that surgery would most likely be needed. While we waited for the ambulance to transport us, they needed to insert an IV. It was awful! Bryce was so brave and didn't even try to pull away, he just cried and screamed "owww! owie!" Over and over. It broke my heart. Once it was in, they decided it wasn't good enough so did it a second time on the other side of the elbow (on his good arm). This time it worked and they gave him morphine, which helped immensely. My mom came in just as his IV was being put in. When it was over I went over to her and she gave me a big hug and I just lost it. I was no longer the strong supportive mother, I became the child. I was crying as she just held me and did what I had been doing for Bryce. Comforting me with words of encouragement and soothing me with love. She kept repeating as I cried, "a mother can do anything for her child, you can do this." And I would. No matter how much pain his pain caused me. It wasn't about me. I would be the mom again and be strong for my son. I wiped my tears, took a deep breath and was ready again to be the mom. But how grateful I am for eternal families and that bond between mother and child that is always there, always strengthening, loving and comforting. Even now as a mother myself.

Just before he was taken over to Children's hospital, my dad came to Montgomery General where we were at and with Brady gave him a blessing. I know the Lord is mindful of all his children and knows their needs even before we do.
Transportation to Children’s was uneventful and I was grateful for that. Once at Children’s, we were put into triage with a screaming child next to us and a sick one next to them. Bryce was calm at this point even with the screaming going on until the IV needed to be put in for the THIRD time. This last time in the hand.
For some reason, the disc they transferred the x-rays on didn't transfer so off to the x-rays room AGAIN! After another round of crying, we were wheeled back to wait for the doctor. And wait, and wait. Finally at 1am, and Bryce had just fallen asleep on my lap, the doctor comes in to tell us he definitely needs surgery and will be admitted for the night. They wanted to do one MORE set of x-rays to get the joints just above and below the brake (which I had asked them to do the LAST time we got the x-rays!) Yeah, not the happiest mama bear at this point. So we wake him up to twist his arm and shoulder in some more painful ways and are wheeled back to wait again. Bryce falls asleep just before 2am when we are finally admitted to a room upstairs. Asking if we can keep the stretcher for a while b/c he just fell asleep and is finally comfortable was apparently too much to ask because the charge nurse came in requesting that he be transferred into his crib. So, he's awake and crying again. Good thing they have ANOTHER empty stretcher back in the ER. That could have been a disaster if they let my baby sleep and they didn't have 5 or so extras...
He gets another dose of morphine and I sing him to sleep around 3am. We answer questions and sign papers until 5:30am when we are finally able to sleep on the plastic couch and chair they have in the room. 6:30am Bryce is awake. I let Brady sleep and lay my body next to Bryce, my head on his pillow and sing to him. He sleeps again for another 20 or so minutes.

(The crib AKA jail he has to sleep in. And looking at the picture, I'm not sure how I managed to get up on there myself and lay and sing to him until he was asleep).
We prep him for surgery around 8am and we say a family prayer before we say good-bye to our baby. I didn't realize they needed to put a tube down his throat to breathe for him or that he "may" have trouble breathing again on his own. I didn't realize that the bone detached might now be dead and blood won't be able to flow through it again resulting in a deformed arm that is not able to move as well as it should. Nor did I think about the nerves that might be affected to restrict the movement in his hand and arm. I also didn't consider the possibility of the growth platelets being affected and having his arm remain the size it is now while the other grows normally. Nope, not until they were about to take my baby away. I listen to the doctor doing his job explaining risks and possible outcomes with tears in my eyes but I will not cry. I am the mother and Bryce will not see me upset. I am the mother. I kiss Bryce on the head running my fingers through his hair telling him how brave he is and that the doctors are going to help his arm get better. I tell him how much I love him and that I'll see him soon. He just looks at me with those trusting big blue eyes and says, "k." It reminds me of the scriptures that tell us to become as a little child and to have their faith. He wasn't scared, he didn't question, he didn't whine, he just trusted me as his parent that I loved him and wanted what was best for him. If only I could heed that scripture as perfectly as Bryce exemplified it in that moment. The perfect humility and trust of a child with an innocence that is unparalleled. I know that Heavenly Father loves and wants what is best for me, but how often do I just have blind faith and put my trust in him completely as Bryce had in me at that moment?
Just before the wheel him away I look at the doctor and tell him to take care of my baby. As soon as the doors close behind us, the silent tears spill down my cheeks. Brady asks what I need and I tell him for us to go up to our hospital room where it was then safe to break down and sob. I am still the mother, but now I can also be the fragile wife and weeping mother.

Composed and in the waiting room, an hour and a half later, in comes the doctor. He shows us the x-ray of his arm now with 3 pins in it. They each stick about ½ inch out of the arm and the hope is that in 3-4 weeks, they can wiggle the pins out and have his arm fully functional again. I already mentioned the risks which they wont’ know until the cast is off and they re-x ray it. He said that the x-rays don’t do justice to the damage that was done. He said that it looked like “a bomb went off in his elbow” with all the cartilage damage. They were able to pin it within 1 mm of the bone, which is good.

(Reading to Bryce after surgery)
So, after staying one more night in the hospital for observation and IV meds we came home around 1pm on Sunday after a long weekend.
We are adjusting ok, and have had so much help from my parents, friends and our church. It’s amazing how much we are loved and cared for by those around us and I’m extremely grateful.

(After Surgery)

(Feeling well enough late that night to want to move around and explore the hospital)

(Ready to go home sitting by the big stuffed rabbit he loves which was Uncle Matt's when he had surgery at 2 years old).
Bryce is sleeping pretty well with his Tylenol with codeine and has even started sleeping in his crib again after needing to be lying by me for a few days singing to him to get him to sleep. Day times are better now, and he’s his happy, active self which is good and bad since the hard cast is not on yet, and I’m supposed to keep it still and elevated. He’s frustrated he can’t use both hands and I am right behind him or holding his hand on the stairs. He is either whiny or trying to move a chair one armed to climb up on to something like usual. We’re doing the best we can. Just keeping him medicated and as still as we can. He is so brave and such a happy spirited boy and I love him more than words could ever express. And our family rule is no more monkey’s jumping on the bed.

(Bryce at home recovering eating raisins with sheepie while watching Barney)