First Day of Kindergarten!

Well just sent off a part of my heart to kindergarten. I can't believe that Carter started school today and although I'm happy and excited for him, I can't help but be a sad for myself. I know, it's not like I'm sending him off to college or anything, but it still feels somehow that this is the beginning of the end. He is in the 'system' now. I won't have the majority of his time anymore. I know that this is part of learning and growing (for both of us) and a good and necessary thing. However, sometimes people have growing pains and I guess that is what I've having right now in the pit of my stomach and my heart.
I am just so happy that he was excited this morning and smiling. He is decked out in Spider-man with his backpack, lunchbox and water bottle. He seems ready for this new adventure and I'm so grateful for that. Hopefully I'll feel ready soon- is it 4:00pm yet?
Play by play of Carter's morning on the first day of school...

Tying his shoes getting ready to leave to catch the (gulp) bus.

Picture time


Walking to the bus stop with a neighbor we watch in the mornings before school

Watching the bus make it's way down the street

Getting on the(double gulp)HUGE yellow bus







Not pictured:
Mom giving several hugs, kisses and waving probably a little too enthusiastically with a big ole over excited smile plastered to my face before coming home, turning on a movie for Bryce to collect my thoughts/feelings and answering the question asked by Brady "what do you need?" by tearfully saying, "I need to hold Carter" and thinking "and never let him go."
Growing pains. A good, needed, painful thing.

Staying home is a privilege

"Staying home is a privilege, staying home is a privilege, staying home is a privilege... " Sometimes chanting the same thing over and over while you are fuming on the inside helps. And sometime sending both kids to their rooms, chanting and blogging helps. (I'll let you know).
I need to remind my self that staying home with my kids and having the luxury to be the one to raise them, especially in this economy is, in fact a privilege.
Sometimes it's hard to remember that when you wake up to whining/crying/fighting, get out of the shower to whining/crying/fighting, finish breakfast with whining/crying/fighting, turn off the blow dryer to hear... can you guess??? It's a stumper. Anyone else see a pattern developing? Sigh. (That felt good). Bigger sigh. (Even better). Maybe I should take time to breathe more. People have said to me, "you are so busy, how do you have time to breathe?" Maybe I don't. Time to start putting into practice some of my social work skills I learned from a Stress management class and breathe. (I know can you believe that counted towards three of my masters level credits)? Regardless of how simple it sounds, I need to remember that.
Yet, I would not have it any other way. I want to see them learn new things, and the light in their eyes when they learn it. I want to be the one to kiss away their "owies" after they try to climb on top of the washing machine to help add the soap and are too impatient to wait for me to help them up, so climb onto a flimsy plastic laundry basket that of course collapses under them resulting in the long bloody scrape on the thigh from the dryer door being open (hypothetically speaking of course... not like this happened this morning or anything).
I want to read to them, to sing to them, to fix them healthy meals and to play with them. I want to be here when someone hurts their feelings to learn a life lesson and how to deal with it. I want to see and hear them laugh, sometimes being the cause of that sweet sound. I want to chase the "real Grinch" away with a flashlight when we play monster while the other uses the pincher to tickle it's tummy or grab it's nose.
Yes, staying home is a privilege. And I am privileged to be these two active, independent and sometimes stubborn little boys mother. I guess they can come out of their rooms now. Gosh, I love those kids.

Funny boys...

Maybe I'm a bit biased, but I think my kids are the funniest kids ever. They say the funniest things.
Bryce while grocery shopping, tripped over his own feet because he rarely walks- he runs, gallops, jumps or skips. Poor thing landed smack on his belly with his little hands smacking the ground by his face. I go to help him up and he looks at me and says with a smile and little embarrassed giggle, "Woah! That hurt my baby! My need to be careful" and rubbed his belly.

And I don't know why but Bryce seems obsessed with death. When I say something like, "be careful Bryce, I don't want you to get hurt" when he's from the coffee table to the couch or something like that, he replies, "yeah, my probably die." Almost EVERY time. Maybe b/c his little friend hamster who lives down the street just died, but I think he said it before that. Sometimes after saying, "yeah, my probably die", he says, "You want me to die mommy? Yes or no?" My reply always the same, although now without the horrified feeling I used to feel at such a morbid question which is, "of course not Bryce. I love you and don't want you to die." I tell him that we have rules, etc to keep him safe because I love him so much I don't want him to get hurt- and especially not die.
It's just so weird how non-chalantley he says it like, "do you like ice cream? Yes or no?" Yesterday my friends neighbor was mowing the lawn without any shoes on and I made a comment without thinking to my friend about how he could cut his toes off and how dangerous that is. Bryce overheard and said, "that'd be sad mommy, then he have no feet and not walk and probably die."
Kids say the darnedest things! I have to say though, now hearing him say stuff like that all the time kind of makes me chuckle inside- yeah, now who's the morbid one??

What to do...

...with a little GIRL???! Yep, that's right folks, somehow we've broken the boy trend and are expecting a little girl. I think I'm still kind of in shock, and although excited a little bit unsure.
During the ulrasound this past week after she told us it was a girl, we kept asking, "are you sure?" Brady kept saying, "that's awesome!" when she said yes.
That morning we asked the boys what they thought we were having and Carter said a "girl baby" and Bryce likes to say the opposite of what Carter says so he said "boy baby." Carter was thrilled to hear he was having a little sister and has not stopped kissing my growing belly and talking to her. (He is very excited that she now has grown ears and will be able to recognize his voice as her big brother Carter).
That afternoon we made sugar cookies with pink frosting and star sprinkles to pass out to family and neighbors to announce our exciting news. (We even gave the trashmen their own tupperware with cookies). Carter made a card and drew a "girl baby" with longer hair and earings "because she's a girl." He traced the words, "it's a girl" on the inside. Very cute. Bryce ate frosting. :) Okay, we all did a little of that.....


So, we find ourselves now contemplating girl names and as for myself wondering if there is a book out there titled, "how to do your little girls hair without pulling out your own."
We are so excitied to welcome this new sweet little child into our home in December!

Here are the ultrasounds we got that day. The top one she is covering her face with her fists, and the bottom is a side profile. Isn't she cute? :)